I'm Tired

This has some lines of earlier poems, but they all needed to be brought together like this.

 I’m tired of crossing finish lines, 

The checkered stripes don’t have the same vibrato they had before,

Just like the floor we danced on,

 The grooves of the spinning vinyl don’t hold the keys that unlock our chests anymore,

They must be lost amongst the melodies of our voices.

And I would sing to you every night if only I had the chance.

Can I have this first dance,

Because I dream of our hips swaying slowly,

 and the music fading slowly,

Our eyes drifting slowly.

I’m tired of being a wallflower,

Leaning against a brick wall,

 in hopes I’ll just fall through it,

 just so I don’t have to see us miss another slow song together.

Searching the crowd just to see you is getting old,

 I wish I could just fold up this memory and throw it away,

It’s the note you never want the teacher to read aloud,

 the words you want to never make a sound,

When you whisper in my ear,

I get chills across my mind just trying to find some way to ignore you,

Because every syllable you let fall from your lips rips me apart,

I can’t begin to start an explanation for this mystery.

Look for clues everywhere but under my shoes,

Because I know I never stepped on anything besides myself,

And I have no answers to give you,

I’ll try my best on any short answer test.

 But I've got the rest of the time to ask questions.

Because there are so many of them.

Like, 

Why do I keep building bridges out of stones, 

Just to see my bones break in a river that’s all dried up.

I’m tired of wasting my time on a turntable that doesn't seem to come back around, 

I wish you would come back around,

Like a flat tire on a car heading towards the edge of a cliff,

You can’t deny the inevitability of falling,

And the few seconds we have during free fall will leave me dangling on the idea that maybe,

 we could have turned around a little earlier,

Made different choices,

Gotten a tire change

This idea can change

Along with the beats our hearts sing to,

And I've always been a little sharp,

But I’m sure you’ll find a way to tune me

 when you leave my strings to settle in the reverberations of a slammed door,

Just like the floor where we danced,

Let’s not miss this chance to get it right,

Because I’m tired of being tired at night.